You can’t make this stuff up!
Three bizarre stories from my store manager days.
1). Irate customer phone call:
“Hello is this the store manager?”
“Yes, this is Bob the store manager, how can I help you?”
“You’re dam right you can help me…I’m about ready to call
the F***ing police!!!”
“I’m sorry sir, what happen?”
“Someone placed a very sharp dangerous dart into our turkey,
and I almost ate the frickin’ thing!”
“Really?, can you describe it?
“Yes, it’s white, about 3 inches long and has a sharp tip.”
“Sir…I think that might be the Pop-Up Timer?”
……long pause, then nothing…customer hung up.
2). Irate customer approached me with a bag in her hands:
“Excuse me, are you the store manager?”
“Why yes, how can I help you?”
“Here, you take this bag…and I want a double your money back
on the turkey, it was terrible!”
“Ma’am, this bag is filled with empty bones.”
“That’s right, I had people over for Thanksgiving…we had to
eat something!”
3). Customer phone call…she is whispering:
“Hello, store manager?”
“Yes, this is Bob, how may I help you?”
“ I wanted to call you first before I notified your regional
office so you can check the other turkeys.”
“Check the other turkeys?”
“Yes…I was cleaning my turkey and getting it ready, and I
found a bag of stuff in the turkey, I
don’t know what it is, it looks like parts of rats or something…I think someone
is trying to poison people, you know like that Tylenol thing.”
“I’m sorry this has frightened you, do you still have the
packing and cooking instructions?, sometimes they are on the outside cover.”
“Yes!”
“How about reading them to me. I want to make sure you got
all the details.”
“Don’t give me the run-around, I want something done about
this!”
“Please, just read the instructions, thank you.”
“Okay!!...here you go; PLEASE REMOVE BAG CONTAINING GIBLETS
BEFORE COOKING.”
…the next sound I heard was the dial tone.
Like I said…you can’t make this stuff up!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!
