Rennerdale - Leadership Lessons from Cousin Nan

1963 was the last time I saw my cousin Nan. She was 7 years old, I was 8.

Yesterday (4-19-18) we met for coffee at the same corner store in Rennerdale PA. where we bought  and shared penny candy 55 years ago.

For two hours we shared our stories. From family, to business...good times, sad times... loves found and lost... I was captivated by the experience, our experience.

Five decades have separated us, yet we both were in sync in how we viewed the world, our world.

Three leadership lessons I learned from Nan:

 1. Back in the early 70's she was the first women sales manager in her company. Was she scared?, Hell yes! "Courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is not accepting fear as an excuse."

2. Nan journeyed through five serious relationships. Never going without blaming herself for some of the failures. Finally she found the love of her life a few years ago, he died suddenly last year.
 "He always wanted me to to get my Masters Degree, and now at the age of 62 I'm going to do just that."
I've never said, why me?... you can not change what happens to us, we can only change what happens within us."

3. After her fourth serious relationship ended in divorce, Nan decided to fulfill a dream of her's since she was a kid, become a professional motorcycle racer.
From 1998 to 2005 she picked up a few sponsors and formed a racing team. She broke a lot of records, several which remain in place today.

And yes! Nan is a veteran. She served during the Cold War.

As we said our goodbyes, I was overwhelmed with joy as I remembered what she said...
"I'm not sure if life is all about,  what is meant to be... I do know that what I do, I mean to do it. I take all the responsibility and embrace every emotion life gives me."

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TEAM 101

Team dynamics fundamentally never change.
Yesterday I was reading an article about team dynamics, first published in the 1940s. Though the experts, yesterday and even today, don't agree on exactly how many roles there are and how to name them, 10 general personality types are consistently identified.

I personally witnessed this at a Client Leadership Training last week in several team exercises I facilitated.

*Here they are:

Task Leader. May or may not be the designated leader; a nuts and bolts, roll-up-the-sleeves-and-get-busy-type.

Social-emotional leader. Concerned with emotional heartbeat of the group; good at solving interpersonal problems.

Tension-releaser. "Breaks the ice" with appropriate humor at the right moment.

Information provider. Has research skills that stand out above all others. Could end up doing unfair amount of work.

Central negative. Always plays the devil's advocate role in discussions but in a non-threatening manner.

Questioner. Constantly seeks clarification and more information.

Silent observer. Speaks little, observing and taking in all information. When he or she speaks up, people listen.

Active listener. Listens attentively, sums up others' points of view. Good for keeping discussion on track.

Recorder. Has good recording skills and little interest in participating in group discussion.

Self-centered follower. Constantly questions opinions is a non-supportive way. Unlike the central-negative person, the self-centered follower is concerned only about personal interests.

So...which one are you?

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